most recent 30 from http://paleohacks.com 2013-05-21T23:47:22Z http://paleohacks.com/feeds/question/65266 http://www.creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/2.5/rdf http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone Ben Nash 2011-09-16T14:35:40Z 2012-07-14T16:50:16Z

<p>If there is hardly any paleo-friendly food available when eating with friends/strangers, what do you eat, and what do you say to your them? </p> <p>(I'm not allergic to grain, refined sugar, or legumes. I just try to not eat them.) </p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/65269#65269 Jeff 2011-09-16T14:43:39Z 2011-09-16T14:43:39Z

<p>That's a really tricky one, my doc even suggested I ditch my vegan friends after they made me soyrizo one time. ha.</p> <p>The best I've come up with to avoid being rude is food allergies. It's not a lie as I really don't do well with gluten, but it seems to be the most innocuous way for any paleo eater to avoid eating certain foods that most people consider normal or healthy, without offending.</p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/65270#65270 vdh1979 2011-09-16T14:44:39Z 2011-09-16T14:44:39Z

<p>Yeah I claim food allergies as well. Just say you have celiac disease or something like that. </p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/65274#65274 Carl_Stawicki 2011-09-16T14:50:10Z 2011-09-16T14:50:10Z

<p>I'll try anything that's really special and homemade, especially if it's something new that I never had before. I don't have to gorge or ask for seconds.</p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/65280#65280 Suz - Paleo Oz 2011-09-16T14:58:46Z 2011-09-16T14:58:46Z

<p>I used to eat what my friends were having so as not to offend or be rude - and pay for it later. </p> <p>Now I'm proud of my healthy stance and I refuse to feel obliged to eat something I don't want to eat. I explain to friends now why I eat the way I do, and I don't care if they approve or not. Most friends are really interested when I explain</p> <p>I'm almost always able to find something to eat; there's normally some kind of meat option. </p> <p>Often people are so wrapped up in what they are eating - I don't think they even notice what isn't on my plate. </p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/65281#65281 Dorado Galore 2011-09-16T14:58:57Z 2011-09-16T14:58:57Z

<p>"Food allergies" covers a vast amount of stuff within the SAD for probably most eaters, so that answer puts you on solid ground. However, for most people food allergies connote something askew in the eater and his physiology, rather than something askew in the food, and I personally hesitate at having to pathologize myself to ensure the comfort level of other people. I think my own inclination would be to beg off with "not particularly hungry" or "already ate." Both can be tricky if the reason for getting together is to have a meal and the chosen venue is Carb City Diner. In which case, yone's options are to lobby for a paleo-friendly venue, without, of course, mentioning anything about paleo. Red Lobster, great for seafood. Steak houses are everywhere. At the end of the day, the most difficult questions will demand reckoning: Why in he'll am I socializing with vegans?" </p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/65282#65282 Red 2011-09-16T14:59:08Z 2011-09-16T14:59:08Z

<p>Just tell them as is, you want to avoid these things to feel better. Vegan people should understand that you have different needs. I often get some comments from friends that are eating the "normal" diet that I should live a little and have some "normal" food! I tell them that I have never been so alive and kicking and never felt so good and happy since I started eating Paleo ..... and the truth is they see it!!</p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/65285#65285 Sarah 2011-09-16T15:00:09Z 2011-09-16T15:00:09Z

<p>I explain that I don't eat grains, beans, legumes, dairy or sugar. I ask about cooking oils as well. It may seem obnoxious to others, but I don't think its rude. My body is healthier without those ingredients, why would I jeopardize my health to appease others?</p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/65290#65290 Gibson 2011-09-16T15:05:54Z 2011-09-16T15:05:54Z

<p>I am unwilling to lie to others just to make this acceptable. This is my life, my body, my health. But tbh, most of the time, there's something paleo-realeted stuff to eat anywhere.</p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/65303#65303 Kelly 2011-09-16T15:26:02Z 2011-09-16T15:26:02Z

<p>I've unfortunately learned the hard way, because I get very sick. After getting over a severe case of what appears to be food poisioning last month (from what I thought was relatively paleo, non allergic foods for me someone made for me), I will no longer eat what they serve...period. I almost ended up in the hospital, it was pretty bad. </p> <p>I let them know ahead of time that I will bring a plate to share (usually a fish dish with lots of veggies)...I have lots of food allergies and I dont expect people to be able to cook for me nor understand....most really dont even after explaining it anyways. </p> <p>In some cultures its odd to bring a plate and probably rude, but its just not worth it. The other option is to eat before you go and don't eat there. That seems just as odd to them, so not much difference.</p> <p>You have to do whats right for you especially if you are paying the price later.</p> <p>good luck!!</p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/65326#65326 Jayme 2011-09-16T16:23:50Z 2011-09-16T16:23:50Z

<p>Most of my dear friends know that I eat a certain way and always accommodate me. If I'm ordering at a restaurant, I say that I have a food allergy.</p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/65339#65339 Jan 2011-09-16T17:09:57Z 2011-09-16T17:09:57Z

<p>There are countries where I would be happy to eat anything they offered, like bread. In some places if i didnt accept the food they gave me, i could live even less with myself than now.<br> But western countries, i say no thanks.</p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/65340#65340 Koko 2011-09-16T17:10:40Z 2011-09-16T17:10:40Z

<p>"That looks great, but:</p> <p>I had a huge lunch I'll just order a salad etc."</p> <p>I don't plan to eat with other people when I am being strict with my food. I've spent enough time around people who talk more than is interesting about their diets; I don't wish to be boring and pedantic, and I find that usually other people care a lot less about what I am eating or not eating than I do. So I will either say nothing and order a non-sharing thing that I do eat.</p> <p>If someone has put effort into cooking something special for me then I will eat it. This is a rare case, and the social and community aspects of eating are more important to me than my food preferences are. </p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/66304#66304 Priscilla 2011-09-20T23:55:44Z 2011-09-20T23:55:44Z

<p>I either eat beforehand, or pick whatever veggies are available (usually salad). Otherwise, I invite people over My house and feed them when I can afford it :) PS Love your photog website!</p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/66326#66326 Jenny C 2011-09-21T03:07:50Z 2011-09-21T03:07:50Z

<p>I tell my friends and family that my stomach has been sensitive lately and that I'm afraid to eat anything that my body is not used to. They seem very sympathetic about it and the truth is, I'm not lying. I get a bad case of diarrhea if I eat anything that's not paleo friendly. </p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/66332#66332 MayaBee 2011-09-21T04:14:53Z 2011-09-21T04:14:53Z

<p>Normally I would just tell everyone what for and eat paleo (how sad I am that my best friend is a vegan!). The only exception to the rule for me is if I am travelling in a third-world or poor country and have been invited in by a family who has generously and lovingly made a meal to share with me despite their impoverished situation - then I really just shut up and eat. This has happened to me in Nepal a few times.</p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/66421#66421 Orla K 2011-09-21T16:39:49Z 2011-09-21T16:39:49Z

<p>I am 100% strict when it comes to eating a gluten free diet, but let everything else slide for special occasions such as eating out. It doesn't bother me one bit to request GF food when I am eating in a restaurant because after all I am paying them for a service.</p> <p>However I absolutely hate it when we are invited to another person's house for dinner. I find it socially embarrassing to let the host know about my dietary restriction, in particular when it is a friend of my husband. I generally say what I can't eat, ie wheat, rye, barley, oats, soy sauce etc, but follow that up immediately with 'but I can eat meat, fish, eggs, vegetables, fruit, potatoes, rice, dairy'.</p> <p>BTW what exactly do people expect me to say when they ask the question 'what happens if I eat gluten'????</p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/66449#66449 coldhandinmine 2011-09-21T17:45:59Z 2011-09-21T17:45:59Z

<p>Eating proffered junk food is a case-by-case determination for me.</p> <p>If it's just my girlfriend wanting to stop and eat fast food on the way home, or a routine cookout with friends, I don't feel bad about abstaining. If people can't deal with that level of relatively innocuous eccentricity without being buttholes about it, that's their problem.</p> <p>If someone has gone out of their way to make me something special, e.g., girlfriend's family making us a dinner and dessert when we visit, etc., then I graciously eat it and am grateful to do so. To me, honoring other people's genuinely kind gestures is as much a part of being a functioning human as any metabolic factor. So if someone's sweet little old grandma makes us a special cake when we visit, I smile and eat the damned cake, probably with ice cream.</p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/96524#96524 jatx www.jasonmoore.me 2012-02-09T18:13:19Z 2012-02-09T18:13:19Z

<p>If someone made food for me specifically, and they didn't know my eating habits, and I'm not allergic/going to get sick from it, then I will eat whatever portion I'm comfortable with.</p> <p>If someone made food for a group and labored over it for hours and didn't know about me the same applies.</p> <p>If someone made something for a group and it was easy/routine then I pass. Explain it however you want, but I don't mind gently and respectfully hurting people's feelings to set a good example.</p> <p>If someone knows about my eating habits and makes stuff anyway with no regard, then I have no problem respectfully declining.</p> <p>In most cases you'll end up talking about Paleo unless you just eat without hesitation. Whether that means it's going to be a big ordeal is usually up to you.</p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/96530#96530 Nance 2012-02-09T18:35:57Z 2012-02-09T18:35:57Z

<p>Since I'm finally beginning to understand just how dangerous it is for me to eat wheat, I will just explain that even if it means I pass on most of the food. Only someone who wishes me ill would expect me to do otherwise. After all, if someone is allergic to peanuts--or a sincerely committed vegetarian or vegan--no one expects them to eat foods that are dangerous/abhorrent to them.</p> <p>All of my friends and family know my situation anyhow, so there's no awkwardness in selecting and choosing (or bringing a few items in my purse.)</p> <p>Otherwise, in a more casual social situation I may choose to splurge on a neolithic treat or stick to what fits my normal eating pattern and it shouldn't be an issue either way if I'm kind and open about my reasons. If you gush about how beautiful everything looks and smells and bemoan your weaknesses, there aren't that many hostesses who'll take insult. And the ones who would aren't the kind of person I want to hang around with anyhow.</p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/96550#96550 Firestorm 2012-02-09T19:21:53Z 2012-02-09T19:21:53Z

<p>I focus on the social aspects of the conversation. I'll often take small amounts of the safest foods being offered, then spend my time contributing to the conversation, and "pack up" the food to take with when it's time to go... If they ask "Aren't you hungry?", I'll usually say "Well, I've become a very slow eater, and I was enjoying the conversation so much I forgot to stop to eat!" -- then I take my "to go" food and leave... </p> <p>...if the food is stuff I can't or don't usually eat, I pass it along to someone who can and does eat it, or I toss it (and if I know I'm going to have to toss it, I choose what I put on my plate very carefully, so as little as possible is wasted). </p> <p>If I go out with someone often, they know my preferences, and try to either prepare foods that they know I'll be able to enjoy too, or we select places to eat where it's easy to find something I can eat on the menu. Even McDonalds has stuff on the menu that one can eat in a pinch (ex.; double hamburger and a side salad-- remove the bun, crumble the hamburger over the salad, and it's a decent meal.)</p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/96557#96557 Laina 2012-02-09T19:37:36Z 2012-02-09T19:37:36Z

<p>Don't say anything and eat what you can. I think it's detrimental to say "oh, this looks great BUT" because people view that as you being a snob about what they put a lot of effort into. If people notice you aren't taking certain things and you don't broadcast why, it'd be rude of them to ask. If they actually ASK, then feel free to be honest, but mostly people just keep their questions to themselves.</p> <p>I handle this often with business dining, and rarely does anyone say "Why aren't you eating bread? Come to the dark side!"</p>

http://paleohacks.com/questions/65266/how-do-you-eat-with-friends-strangers-without-being-rude-especially-if-someone/135237#135237 sargon 2012-07-14T16:50:16Z 2012-07-14T16:50:16Z

<p>"Please forgive me but I'm on an extremely strange diet."</p> <p>This makes it clear that you are not implicitly criticizing them. It also makes your food choices intriguing, inviting them to ask about your diet. </p>