many of you may be aware of the "shit girls say" youtube video that spawned dozens of knockoffs. there's a "shit vegans say," so i think there should be a "shit paleo people say."
who's with me?
i'll start: "its not a diet, its a lifestyle."
To sick friend: "Have you considered switching up your diet?"
To overweight friend: "Have you considered switching up your diet?"
To underperforming friend: "Have you considered switching up your diet?"
To depressed friend: "Have you considered switching up your diet?"
To friend being attacked by a shark: "Have you considered switching up your diet?"
Is three bunches of kale enough?
I'm so inflammed! Can you pass me some fish oil?
I am SO building a fire pit!
Did you have your D tested yet?
Oh my god, I am SO missing the sun!
He's like so cute, in a pasty, kind of vegan way.
What do you mean insulin doesn't make you fat? It does too, bitch!
Hey, it's part of my frickin' 20%, okay? [whilst scarfing potato chips] And potatoes are a safe starch!
But I read where Kurt Harris and John Durant both ate a cookie.
Last week I was primal, this week I'm whole 30, next week I'm gonna try Ray Peat.
I'm 'bout to go ham.
can you pass me the kerrygold? oh, and the coconut oil?
what do you mean i can't climb this tree?!
yea, i'd like 4 dozen eggs.
i'm trying the 'safe-starch'-thing right now.
what do you mean you stay on the treadmill for 45 minutes?!
sex is considered 'play,' right?
no, thanks. i'm doing my weekly 24-hour fast.
my omegas are totally out of balance right now.
do you mind if i grab that log?
i'm working on liking the 99% dark chocolate.
you need to read this success story!
'What kind of offal do you eat?'
'Are there grains in this?'
'Is __ paleo?'
'How can I consume more fat?'
'Are 6 eggs/day enough?'
'What's your favorite bone broth?'
'She's probably a vegan'
Person 1 (in the process of transitioning from SAD to Paleo):
Q: "I'm so hungry all the time! I just want bread and pasta! How did you do it?!"
A: "Just keep putting nuts and meat in your mouth"
Ohhh....the innuendo ;]
Having problems with pooping?skin?love?the moon?
eat more fat!
Do you have heavy cream for my coffee? Yeah, the real HEAVY one.
Please without the Rice, but more Veggies/Meat!
Yeah, one CAN live without the f*cking bread.
Nope, whole grains are evil, too. Very sorry.
"Can I leave early? I have 30 pounds of grass fed beef sitting on my doorstep and I don't want it to spoil." ^True story.
No, I said a Norcal Margarita. Yes, with real lemon juice, and loads of tequila. No, don't sweeten it, yes, I do like it like that.