Blog

35

14

What are the most popular variations on the general theme of paleo diets? Can you describe them in fifteen words or less? If so, please submit your suggestion and they'll be added to the alphabetically-ordered list.

Archevore: Avoid neolithic agents of disease such as gluten and excess fructose and n6 fatty acids

Colpo: Protein per LBM, carbs per activity level, rest natural fat. Eat "paleo" foods, no grains.

Deep Nutrition: Eat meat on bone, fermented foods, sprouted stuff and fresh plants, and organ meats

Faileo: Low-fat turkey and chicken breast, steamed broccoli and carrots, "paleo" almond nut brownies.

Foodie Paleo: Spend more of budget on paleo-ish food, emphasize hedonism, reject term "foodie"

Lazy-Ass Paleo: Slim Jim's, Fake Cheese, Questionable apples, from locally owned smoke shop, beer is ok -head in sand.

Leangains: Fasting and Lotsa protein and carbs after lifting, cycled with lower carb, without paleo emphasis

Leptin Rx: Optimizing hormones and electrons through protein breakfast, potentially cold adaptation, etc.

Low Reward: Avoiding seasonings and added flavors to decrease overeating from eating rewarding (rewarding not equal to palatable) foods

Perfect Health Diet: Quantifying macronutrients and micronutrients with moderate "safe starches", nutrient dense foods, and supplement list

Primal: Paleo without remnants of Cordain like saturated fat avoidance, absolutely no dairy, etc

PSMF, paleo style: Eat pretty much only animal protein and veggies with negligable fat and carbs for rapid fat loss

Raw Paleo: Raw paleo foods, duh. Often includes only meat or mostly meat.'

Ray Peat: Coconut, fruit, sugar, orange juice, dairy, salt, and gelatin diet for warmth, hair and sex.

Rosedale Diet: High fat, low carb, lowish protein for longevity and weight loss

Slow Carb: Paleo with lots of beans, less fat emphasis, and required cheat days.

Wahls Diet: Multiple Sclerosis diet with sulfurous veggies, berries, seaweed, organs

Whole 30: Paleo diet with no "cheats" for 30 days

flag
2 
 Why is it all so complicated! – Matt Mar 18 2012 at 21:10
4 
 Entropy, I think. – Kamal♦ Mar 18 2012 at 21:10
8 
 I'll include Ray Peat when a Peatarian offers to sum him up in fifteen words or less. – Kamal♦ Mar 18 2012 at 21:11
1 
 15 words = HARD! – none Mar 18 2012 at 21:21
1 
 Deep Nutrition includes raw dairy. It's very WAPF-like. – Dave S. Mar 20 2012 at 12:38
show 18 more comments

21 Answers

13

Lazy-Ass Paleo: Slim Jim's, Fake Cheese, Questionable apples, from locally owned smoke shop, beer is ok -head in sand.

This is how my best friend attempted Paleo. She has been on it since Jan 1 and "hasn't lost a pound" "paleo sucks"

link|flag
7 
 sounds like what my dad does.. "This fried chicken is paleo right? It's meat!" or "This gas station corndog is OK because corn is a vegetable and the hotdog is meat." face palm. He's still lost 50 lbs, but I think mainly because he eats pretty well @ home. – Bread-Eating Beelzebub Mar 20 2012 at 0:42
1 
 Melissa -Yup, your dad is just like my friend. Its actually pretty funny. I told her about the "safe starch" controversy, so she started eating Arby's curly fries everyday. Love her, but damn. – Senneth Mar 20 2012 at 15:01
1 
 Senneth how are the curly fries going for him? I used to love Chili's curly fries - now the smell of industrial vegetable oils nauseate me. – Lady_Arwen Mar 23 2012 at 16:32
Lady Arwen -I am at my wits end. My friend ate Curly fries just yesterday!! She now says tells everyone she is PALEO, but since she has one cheat AT EACH MEAL, I would say she is just the plain old SAD diet. Its starting to really piss me off how much smack she is talking when she isn't even walking the walk. I have outright told her that her that she should just go back to regular grain filled eating, just so I don't have to hear her complaining anymore. – Senneth Mar 23 2012 at 17:50
I think you should encourage her for the efforts she is making and recommend her to go to 80% Paleo Sisson style which out of 21 meals would be 17 stricter Paleo meals and 4 meals with gluten-free cheats such as red wine, dark chocolate, rice, beans, corn etc. I know it's frustrating watching but everyone has to start somewhere. Don't tell her to go back to grain-eating. She's on the right path, she just needs some guidance and encouragement. Offer her yummy Paleo food and recipes. Honestly she won't feel deprived when she realizes there are so many tasty and easy ways to eat Paleo! – Lady_Arwen Mar 24 2012 at 4:41
show 1 more comment
12

Melissa's Veblen Good diet: Mainly eat really expensive ridiculous things. Emphasis on hedonism.

link|flag
I live vicariously through your indulgent food experiences. – Dave S. Mar 19 2012 at 17:18
No money...no good. – ROB Mar 20 2012 at 0:44
12

Mainstream Media (MSM) Paleo- weird extremists; must reference cavemen, risks of saturated fat, red meat; no mention of vegetables.

link|flag
3 
 Or they incorrectly state "it's a high protein diet, and your kidneys will implode into black holes and end the universe." – raydawg Mar 19 2012 at 21:04
Even better Raw Paleo - the one's eating raw meat.. etc. – Lady_Arwen Mar 23 2012 at 16:32
and only crazy wild-eyed bearded dudes. The girls are edited out as inconsequential and unimportant girlfriends. – MF Apr 1 2012 at 16:31
10

Anthony Colpo Fat Loss Bible diet = protein per LBM, carbs per activity level, rest natural fat. Eat "paleo" foods, no grains.

link|flag
2 
 This is going to need a seconding Merbear. – Kamal♦ Mar 18 2012 at 21:39
1 
 I got so excited - this was the only other "diet" approach I could link to Paleo in any way. You're right though. You definitely want to be measured in your doses of Colpo. – none Mar 18 2012 at 21:48
1 
 I second it.... – peter Mar 19 2012 at 1:20
2 
 Do I have to include Tim Ferris stuff to then? – Kamal♦ Mar 19 2012 at 4:41
2 
 Just read his book.(not for fat loss)...good stuff. – ROB Mar 20 2012 at 0:45
show 2 more comments
10

Faileo: Low-fat turkey and chicken breast, steamed broccoli and carrots, "paleo" almond nut brownies.

Poverty Paleo: Paleo for students and people on food stamps. Dumpster diving, bartering, and greater lee-way with safe starches/fermented legumes/grains.

link|flag
1 
 Under Poverty Paleo: greater leeway includes CAFO beef. – Nance Mar 19 2012 at 21:53
You can also add overtraining and/or poor sleep to Faileo - people who are doing strenuous/endurance exercise 5+ week (or training at ungodly hours and sleeping poorly) and aren't improving their body comp. – Lady_Arwen Mar 19 2012 at 22:46
8

Archevore: There is no such thing as a macronutrient. Avoid the neolithic agents of disease.

link|flag
How did I forget about that one? – Kamal♦ Mar 19 2012 at 3:03
was wonderin' :) – Invisible Caveman Mar 19 2012 at 3:23
No such thing as a macronutrient is an amazing piece of work... – Eric Mar 19 2012 at 6:13
It also doesn't really add up with the observations of those who really are experts at body recomposition. Anyway, Archevore needs something about your RDA of parasitic worms. – Harfatum Apr 27 2012 at 3:08
7

Swiss Paleo = Paleo + Dairy
Lacto Paleo = Paleo + Dairy

link|flag
5 
 Maybe Swiss Paleo = Paleo + Dairy + lots of dark chocolate? – gydle Mar 19 2012 at 5:51
Very Cool!!! I like that!!! :-) – Eric Mar 19 2012 at 6:12
7

"Ridiculous paleo"...freaking out about everything having to do with paleo. Or maybe that's "Panic Paleo"

link|flag
9 
 You mean...paleohacks paleo? :) – Kamal♦ Mar 20 2012 at 22:46
LOL - sad but true ... – Lady_Arwen Mar 23 2012 at 16:34
6

SCD/GAPS: temporary diet for rebuilding gut flora, no complex sugars/starches (includes table sugar)

link|flag
1 
 I was thinking for GAPS - broth, ferments, probiotics, no complex sugars to rest the intestines. – Kelly Mar 20 2012 at 14:00
1 
 Oh and since I had leftover words, I'd probably add broth a few more times for good measure :) – Kelly Mar 20 2012 at 14:02
5

Ray Peat : higher-carb diet that focuses on PUFA, phosphorus, cysteine and tryptophan restriction for optimal thyroid health.

That's 15 words. It's not a perfect definition, but it would be a shame to ignore it.

link|flag
9 
 Coconut, fruit, sugar, orange juice, dairy, salt, and gelatin diet for warmth, hair and sex. – Dave S. Mar 19 2012 at 17:14
3 
 I like Dave's one better than my own. – Korion Mar 19 2012 at 18:58
1 
 You rock Korion, but I like Dave S.'s better too! – Senneth Mar 19 2012 at 21:54
2 
 I forgot the carrots! – Dave S. Mar 20 2012 at 12:35
2 
 Nah you didn't :), otherwise you'd have to add aspirin, topical vitamin e, shellfish, niacinimade, ... too. – Korion Mar 20 2012 at 12:51
show 3 more comments
5

Orthodox paleo (Cordain): Lean meats, fish, eggs, veggies, fruit, nuts and diet soda. No grains, dairy or salt.

link|flag
4

paleo zone: paleo diet ala cordain/sisson with macronutrient rx calibrated to personal protein requirements.

link|flag
4

De Vany/Evolutionary Fitness: Cordain-ish plus fasts, strength training and high intensity exercise. Aim for randomness and kurtosis.

link|flag
3

"Paleo" for those with abnormal glucose regulation:

same as Archevore, plus Dr. Richard Bernstein's Law of Small Numbers.

link|flag
3

Modern Reenactment Paleo: Hunt/gather your food; eat animals, fish, shellfish, berries, roots, leaves, and mushrooms in the wild.

Not recommended as a sole source of food. Do it carelessly enough and you'll eventually eat something that makes you long for the days when gluten was the worst thing to enter your stomach.

link|flag
Related to freeganism, I think. – Kamal♦ Mar 20 2012 at 22:46
Yes, perhaps with less dumpster diving. – Mscott Mar 20 2012 at 23:15
Might incur injuries/death from fighting animals/people for food and/or digestive distress from eating the wrong plant .. – Lady_Arwen Mar 23 2012 at 16:35
3

Stone Soup Paleo: a dash of each to create own's unique melting pot optimal diet/lifestyle; constantly shifting

link|flag
3

Militant Paleo: "My diet is the one and only way to eat. I'll cut you!"

link|flag
...just like that piece of bread is cutting your intestines! – Corbab Apr 2 2012 at 4:57
1

Slow Carb: Paleo with lots of beans, less fat emphasis, and required cheat days.

link|flag
1

Zero Carb: eat only of the animal kingdom.

link|flag
I thought some non-starchy veggies and fermented veggies (like sauerkraut) could effectively be 0 carb due to the fiber and energy it takes to break it down. What about avocado? – Lady_Arwen Mar 23 2012 at 16:37
0

Primal: Saturated Fat, pastured meats, vegetables, fruits, some dairy, dark chocolate, and red wine okay.

I came into paleo from Primal, so the definition given makes no sense to me. Of course saturated fat is good for you :)

link|flag
0

I really don't know where my version of paleo falls here or see how I could get it all in 15 words (but after writing it out I think I came up with something that made sense).

Old School 10: fresh, natural, or traditionally processed foods that are 10 or less on the glycemic load.

  • Glycemic load per serving of 10 or under = eat all you want; over ten and it's off the menu (this knocks out grains, beans, fruit juices, and most natural sweeteners, but allows some non-paleo items like traditional cheeses).

  • Avoid processed foods and eat fresh/non-processed food (by processed, I mean modern processing methods; old-school processing methods like pickling, smoking, and such are OK).

  • No unnatural sweeteners/sugars (this nixes anything with high fructose corn syrup as well as things like aspartame), but allow natural sweeteners like honey if they fall under the GL 10 limit.

  • No unnatural fats (margarine, canola oil, corn oil, etc...), but eat all the natural fats you want (animal fat & pressed oils like coconut and olive).

  • Liquids limited to water and coffee (the one vice I can't break).

  • No calorie counting.

  • Eat when you're hungry (if you're in between meals and hungry, eat a snack) and don't eat unless you are hungry (if it's meal time and you're not hungry, skip the meal or put it off an hour).

link|flag

Your Answer

Not the answer you're looking for? Browse other questions tagged or ask your own question.