First of all, stop comparing yourself and your boyfriend. No. Really. STOP IT. Men have completely different weight loss issues than women, plus no two people lose weight exactly the same. You need to find what works for you.

I would love to work with you and see your food logs daily. Is there any chance I can talk you into signing up on Livestrong? That way I could see and comment on your food logs. You can friend me as sherpamelissa there too.

There is a way to make Paleo work for you. You may need to go high fat/lower carb or you may need to go higher fat/lower protein. You need to pick a new protocol and stick to it for a month and see what happens.

I know you were having some issues with food choices at work or at restaurants, is that still an issue or have you been able to stay stricter this last month?

First, as a 40 year old female I think most Victoria's Secret models are built like 12 year old boys but opinions vary. Second, I'm not a P.h.D. but I think you aren't eating enough. 1600-1800 seems low for someone at 187 pounds. Remember to let go of the calories in/calories out paradigm. It is incorrect. Eat more fat.

Dr Mike Eades has a posting today regarding this issue in relationship to Gary Taubes' book WHY WE GET FAT AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT. http://www.proteinpower.com/drmike/low-carb-library/why-we-get-fat/

You basically have too much insulin in your system and it won't let the fat out of your cells. Your fat cells are insulin resistant.

You can make headway but you have to strictly follow the ketogenic program...unlike your BF who can make headway without such a strict protocal.

I strongly urge you to read the following two posts. Then read them again. And then read the comments.

http://www.archevore.com/panu-weblog/2009/8/27/how-to-lose-weight.html

http://high-fat-nutrition.blogspot.com/2008/05/weight-loss-when-its-hard.html

It ain't easy. I struggle too. I need to drop another 50-60 pounds and I've been on a plateau for a while. But when I follow the advice above, it works. I basically have to go ketogenic to keep my blood sugar and insulin stable (meaning low enough) to lose fat.

Don't compare yourself to your boyfriend unless you can see what his insides look like and see into the future to find out how he fares. Men too, hit brick walls, and women too, continually lose weight and reach their goals.

I got over my plateau recently and went down from a 12 to an 8 (so far) by including strength training. No, I don't look like a body builder, but the fat melted off to reveal the figure underneath that was previously shrouded in fat rolls. When I had problems with PCOS, I bulked up but didn't lose fat, but now, eating very low carb, I'm seeing muscle tone on a smaller body and not just mass on a big body.

I started eating less fish and more fatty meat and cut out all processed meat (including bacon). I go to bed earlier to get more sleep so my body recovers. I also am eating less fruits and vegetables. I need the muscle to increase insulin sensitivity and my overall metabolic rate. To stay strong, you have to eat more and not skip meals if you're hungry. I do some cardio work, like sprinting and jump roping, and mostly slow things like hiking, bike riding, resistance and strength training. I walk to the grocery store and carry heavy bags home. I do the strength training about 2-3 times a week for 15-30 minutes at a time, gradually increasing and broadening the workout. This includes things like body weight resistance exercises like push-ups and hatha yoga to small trips to a public weight room up a mountain nearby. I work 50 hours a week teaching ESL to young children so I don't have time to go to a gym after work. I work out a lot at home while my dinner is cooking/cooling/marinating.

I agree with everyone else that you should eat more - more protein and less carbs. If your body gets into the habit of starving early on and on a regular basis, it's going to want to hold onto fat for fuel. Eat the veggies you like but don't make them the bulk of your meals. Sometimes I just have mine in the morning with my eggs and don't eat them for lunch or dinner.

I found that in the beginning, when I was wearing a size 18/20 and weighing about 200 lbs., that trying to purposely eat more fat that wasn't incidental, like on the meat I was eating, wasn't helping. I was able to increase the fat as I reduced the carbs, but I ate when I was hungry, and ate until I was full and didn't count calories.

Keep in mind too that your body is healing on the inside and outside. Mine took a lot of work. My pancreas and thyroid adjusted and had to learn that the rest of my body wasn't ignoring them anymore. My hormones leveled out, and my body had to figure out what to do with the food I was eating that now could be used as fuel rather than poison to be neutralized. It also had to figure out what to do with all the extra energy I was giving it by eating more.

Weight loss doesn't always equal getting healthy (Medifast/bulimia). Your body may be warming the engines now for the big race so that before you know it, you'll walk out of Lane Bryant empty-handed and elated that everything is too big for you.

If what you are doing (20-30% protein and 15-20% carbs) is not working, and you are exasperated, why don't you try something else? Up your fat to at least 70%, preferably 80-85% and see what your results are.
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Start skipping breakfast and eat WAY bigger meals for lunch and dinner. Then add a couple times a week walk to your regiment.

Be sure to totally eliminate fructose.

Make sure you have good data: scales suck. Just do body fat analysis.

And remember, this is a slow and steady process.

I'm not an expert here, but you might consider using coconut oil instead of butter or ghee for awhile. Also taking some coconut oil before meals (up to 2 tablespoons) could help with metabolism issues. I would not be afraid of fat, and definitely reduce vegetables to the bare minimum, and be careful of any sauces/condiments. I know that if I get any form of MSG it stalls out my weight loss.

In the short run, you don't need veggies--we've just all been conditioned to think that a few meals without them will result in something close to death.

No one knows what will correct your problem and get your body to release fat--you'll probably need to experiment. Women seem to find it harder than men. I would suggest dipping frequently into ketosis (VLC/IF) as a first thing to try, along with lots of sleep, reduced stress (house hunting can be a real pain), walks, and occasional short bouts of very intense exercise. That might work very well for you. If not, you might need to try something else.

I scanned all the previous answers and did not see this mentioned.. apologize if it was.

She is 187lbs and eating 1600-1800 calories.. sounds like she is starving her self imho.

Oranges13 why not spend 1-2 weeks eating till your full? I think purposefully trying to attain a deficit might be holding you back, eat 3 meals a day, breakfast lunch and dinner and eat till full. If you need a number id say you should be hitting around 2200 calories a day to be honest. You wont gain weight and probably boost your metabolism.

Also up your protein intake.

Good luck, stalls suck.

Like many said, you could go VLC for a month or so. At least give it a shot for two weeks or so. If you have that much weight to lose I'd say keto will help. Morning fasted walks will help. Then eat fat and meat for lunch and dinner with minimal veggies. I LOVE veggies and although they don't seem like they have carbs if you eat them like I do for dinner you can easily get 50-100 grams of carb down. Usually that's fine but if you're stuck, eliminate them. What's the worst that can happen?

Relax, stop counting calories, throw away your scale, and eat more food.

Make sure that you're getting 8+ hours of really solid sleep in a pitch-black room every night. Limit stress as much as possible (like worrying too much about your scale weight).

Don't eat fruit or nuts.

EAT BREAKFAST! And lunch. And dinner. Protein and fat at every meal, and add leafy greens if you want them.

Walk around some, lift heavy things, and eat enough to fuel your activity level.

Did I mention you should throw away your scale? And I mean both the one you use on yourself and the one you use for your food... :)

Are you chronically stressed? Is your boyfriend easygoing? Constantly elevated cortisol can compete with decreased insulin and lead to stalled, slowed, or even reversed fat loss, just depends on the strength of each signal and your sensitivities to each hormone. Both factors are genetic to some extent and may vary between you and your boyfriend, even given the same stress level, hence the varied results.

I know, i know, i will get another down vote for this, but here is what i think...i would cut the bacon, and use only very little fat for cooking...also try to eat wild fish and grass fed meat ( i know its really expensive) whenever you can...good luck! :)

I haven't lost a bit of weight, myself. It's not my Paleo raison d'etre, but nevertheless, IT WOULD BE NICE. I'm about 20-25 lbs overweight.

Your weight loss the first week was "water-weight". Sadly it'll come right back if you go back to your old ways.

I'm interested in the answers of others. I think they are going to say: Eat more fat, sleep more, cut the stress. Sigh. Shrug.

I still can't figure out if I should start running again, or not.

I saw in your above answer that you might not get enough sleep.

If I can't stress it enough, you need sleep. Cortisol production can seriously inhibit your weight loss.

I know, because I was there. Blackout blinds are now in my room, and I make sure to get at least 8-10 hours a night. More if I think I need it. I know that when I go on vacation next week I have an appointment with sleep, no alarm clock allowed. I'm thinking 15-16 hours each day :)

I also would recommend Robb Wolf's book the paleo solution if you haven't read it. He mentions alpha lineolic acid and l-carnitine deficiency, magnesium (fizzy stuff), plus the enzymes for food. I know I added them and I feel better.

I also made sure to cut out the bad stuff. No potatoes, no dairy (well, I eat butter, but will cut that out too if needed) in addition to all the normal stuff I should cut out, and focus on a gram of protein per lb of bodyweight, some veggies, and fat till I'm satiated.

I was at a stop for weightloss for the past 3-4 weeks or so, but am finally starting to see progress again. I'm not sure if it's one specific thing on the list, but I'm at least happy to see something happen.

Oh, and one final thing. A measuring tape would help more than a scale. At least then you could see if something is happening.

Just thought I'd let you know that My plateau that lasted over a month finally went away. I'm really glad I stuck with it. I even cheated once and started having a half a sweet potato once a week (with brunch on Saturday's) and I've lost another 9 lbs in 3 weeks. Keep up with it. Don't give up. I was seriously considering giving up and going back to weight watchers and i'm glad I didn't. WW's always made me starving and zippy in a bad way.

Good luck!