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I know this sounds a bit weird but many people think I am "less masculine" because I try to eat healthy. Maybe it's because most of the people I hang out with are "ghetto"? Or because I am Mexican, you know Mexican's and their machismo, something about them seeing vegetables on a plate automatically turns on a switch that tells them it's food for a man who violates or does not meet traditional male gender role. Do any of you experience the same thing?

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You should tell them "You're right. Cancer brings all the girls to the yard." – Anja Jan 28 2012 at 22:46
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I'm female but I have to say I kind of get the same thing - if I order a salad or replace fries with a side of vegetables, I'm the silly girl starving herself and "watching her figure", not someone who wants to preserve her health and actually likes the tastes of vegetables. It seems to be ingrained in a lot of people's minds that salads and veggies are girl food, and that meat is guy food. Unless it's skinless chicken breast - that's girl food, too. – OddBallin Jan 28 2012 at 22:51
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If you are in great shape--much better than your peers--the negativity is likely to stop. – Daniel Kirsner Jan 28 2012 at 23:17
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I thought that being part of fight club was that you no longer care what people say? – Bill1102inf Jan 29 2012 at 3:29
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As a high school student, I've found that they stop once you start to become ripped. Keep at it, Rob. – Adulescens Appetens Jan 29 2012 at 4:01
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19 Answers

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I know you are probably looking for a male perspective, but I'll voice my opinion nevertheless. That is absolutely ridiculous. There might be a lingering association between women and dieting (things like dance aerobics have a similar stigma) which could explain some jokes, and there's nothing wrong with occasional humour, but if people are really being serious in telling you that being conscious about your health is a woman's prerogative and hence diminishes your manliness, that is either a sign of total immaturity or an inner jealousy that manifests itself this way.

I would only expect someone who is seriously immature to associate (not just use a stereotype to create a joke) being health-conscious with some distorted idea of feminine vanity & obsession about weight (which is irrelevant); or, they are innately jealous of you being able to look after your health, so they dredge up this stereotype to make themselves feel better.

Think about it, how is being strong, health-conscious and disciplined enough to turn down temptation non-manly? To tell you the truth, to me, there is nothing more off-turning than a man who has let himself go, and who treats his body like a trashcan into which he'll throw absolutely anything. Most women like men who respect themselves and care about their health.

Just a female perspective there for you.

Those who mind don't matter; those who matter don't mind.

All the best, Grok on, and keep eating veggies :-D

Milla

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I agree completely. It is completely immature to think the way many people do. Funny thing is, my Aunts are the ones that give me the most shit for trying to eat healthy. Uncles and cousins say things indirectly, but my aunts say it straight up. – ROB Jan 28 2012 at 23:03
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Well, with older generations sometimes you either have the ones that really care about their health, and the ones who came from the era of the Depression (or whose parents did) who can't bare the idea of being picky about what you eat; the latter also lived through the era when all the aerobics and fat-phobia boomed, among women. So it's understandable in that case since it's just a product of mentality set by life experience. Aunts tend to be quite straight talking anyhow ;-)) – Milla Jan 28 2012 at 23:13
Milla, you always give insightful responses. I agree with you as well. And I must say, results speak for themselves, no matter what critics of personal eating habits may say. – Caleb the Hobbit Jan 29 2012 at 0:25
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I get kinda grossed out by guys who can't seem to take care of themselves nutritionally (can't cook at all, eat mostly boxed foods). I don't really care about the taste/complexity/preferences of what they cook really, just they fact that they put some attention into basic self-care. The ones who can't usually seem to live in some sort of poverty...emotional, maturity, worldliness, intellectual, generosity....it's really just a turn-off to me as a woman. – Heather Jan 29 2012 at 20:04
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I question the masculinity of guys with wide hips and man boobs from having too many phytoestrogens, especially present in hops.

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Hahahahaha..... – Phazo Jan 29 2012 at 7:00
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I have in the past, yes. Depending on the situation, I've reacted in different ways. With some, it's been something a bit childish but fun, like who has the stronger grip, or arm-wrestling, etc. Call me a sissy if you will for eating big leafy greens and salmon, but in my mind, strength speaks for itself.

With other people, a more rational approach can be used. Explaining that I have celiac, and that the way I eat allows me to be fit and healthy without supplements or even things like protein shakes. The truth, like strength, speaks for itself.

Then sometimes it has to be a combination of both. Like, "I eat this way, and it works for me, so then I can do the kinds of things I want to do." And I thusly mention walking barefoot in forests, rowing several times weekly, etc.

As time has worn on though, my approach has changed. I find that paleo has allowed me to embrace a (literally) primal masculinity. My posture has improved, my body has become more muscular, etc. All of these things lead to both a physical and mental kind of self-acceptance, even a kind of presence. I don't do it to flaunt it, I do it because I am proud of who I am becoming and my accomplishments with my health. Others seem to pick up on how I carry myself. If anyone questions it, I've come to realize that it is no longer my problem. I am confident in my masculinity without their approval.

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Not at all for me. Maybe because I'm 5'10 200lbs with 8% body fat, and feed my dog raw meaty bones, eat sardines by the can, rip apart grass fed beef, eat cartilage off bones, and crack whole eggs with my teeth and slurp them down.

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im six feet four and 228 pounds of kick ass. i dont think anyone is going to question my sissy food. some days my shopping cart is just vegtables and coconut milk. LOL

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Sweet, except I am not that big hahaha. – ROB Jan 28 2012 at 23:39
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Real men eat whatever they damned well like!

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they alwaays make fun of me at the firestation. I am not one of the crew because I don't eat what they cook.

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He who laughs last... ;) Someday Nathan, someday – Sam Jan 28 2012 at 22:53
I'd rather a paleo crewman bust into my home to save me if needed. Atleast I know he'll be in peak fitness and more likely to survive my burning home. Those grains'll slow you down man. – Zach Jan 29 2012 at 20:31
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I think everyone that chooses to shun the SAD will probably experience some sort of sociological challenge related to their decision.

We've all heard that people question or criticize anything that isn't status quo and personally, I think the genesis of this behavior is insecurity that arises from a desire to be accepted and from a group-think mentality.

As for masculinity, in a literal sense, anyone who eats like we do and nourishes their body will by default have an advantage in quantifiable masculinity. Period. When you start to get all the attention from women and your normalized/optimized testosterone levels, as well as your clear thinking put you at the "head of your pack", I doubt you'll hear so much as a squeak out of these individuals. You may even have converts on your hands.

The gains from being Paleo have far outweighed the social challenges (for me) but that may not be clear to many for some time after implementation. Stick with it, and believe me, you will have the last laugh.

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I am already having the last laugh...like Milla said, the fact that maybe I am able to eat healthy and they can't pisses them off. My Uncle for example, who happens to be diabetic, tries his hardest to make me drink soda, and ignores all my advice. – ROB Jan 28 2012 at 23:05
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Thought 1:

Sometimes I get 'gay' when people low on vocabulary mean 'different'... A tag I will totally eat-up and make my own.

Yeah, I am different, and I like it.

Sure, it can be an irritant to stick out and be questioned about it. I'm practicing ignoring the opinions of those I did not request an opinion from.


Thought 2:

I tell the truth. My hobby is kicking ass and honing my combat skills.

I'm 'in training' for a martial arts seminar this summer.

If I want to kick ass and never tire... This is how I MUST eat most of the time.

What I'm trying to say here is that 'in training' gets respect, while 'on a diet' gets more name calling and ridicule.

Your macho morons may vary.

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I am 6'1", about 180lbs, no fat, mid 40's (paleo 5 years) and I run a crew that works very hard outside all day long and I am in better shape & can out last all the guys half my age on the crew. If I go to the bar with them (which is rare) I always get younger women approaching me and ignoring the younger guys around me. I am never bugged about the way I eat :)

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interesting about the women, one in front of me smiled at me twice in the store and then waited on me in her car outside the damn grocery store. my wife is already 13 years my juinor so i just went home. – coprophagous Jan 29 2012 at 2:49
smart man you are – Bill1102inf Jan 29 2012 at 5:19
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According to PaleoHacks, "masculinity" doesn't seem to be much of a problem:

Increased circulation to...certain areas...

Supplements ... Also, which one is making me horny??

Best Paleo Sexual Aid

So anytime they comment on you being gay, just tell them their girlfriend wasn't complaining ...

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Or better yet, their mother wasn't complaining. :) but you'd better be able to punch the other guy's lights out if you go this route. – raydawg Jan 29 2012 at 13:58
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You are probably just making them uncomfortable. Trying to do better often makes people who don't try feel bad about themselves. Like the jerk guy last week who told me I was "such a hipster" because I shop at Whole Foods and like grass-fed meat. Yep, my opinions made him uncomfortable about his lifestyle choices, so he just became dismissive. "Yeah, I don't have to eat better. Eating better is for insert insulting term"

It's all kind of hilarious because paleo is often seen as a very masculine diet. I guess people see it in whatever way gives them an excuse to eat their pasta and keep their beer belly.

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I've cut out alcohol for 2012...and I'm not looking forward to football season as I just know I'm going to cop sorts of "friendly banter" from the boys.

I've lost 6kg (14lb) already though so I don't mind that much at all...people can call me whatever they want.

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Congrats. Cutting alcohol almost 3 years ago has been one of the best things I have ever done. Keep it up and I guarantee you will be pleased with the results! – Nate Jan 29 2012 at 18:39
It's the hardest thing I've ever done. Alcohol made my life so much easier... – Korion Jan 29 2012 at 18:52
I don't see a reason to; alcohol in moderation is ok. – Wisper Jan 30 2012 at 9:27
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No

Willpower = Manly

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I would just ignore the ignorant people. I recently became paleo and try to spread all the information i have been learning to others and only a few listen, most don't care and then a few will comment negatively and ignorantly.. My friend calls me a hippie now because i eat veggies and healthy foods. I am a tall and fairly well built guy and he is short and larger built, more or less fat, but he eats lots of packaged and processed foods. I think food quality goes a long long way. Healthy foods all the way!

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I feel like the amount of meat/eggs I eat usually counters the girly stigma attached to the salad that I have for lunch. Eating 4-5 eggs every morning and 16 ounces of steak every night seems very manly to most outsiders.

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I absolutely have only heard praise and admiration. A little light teasing at work that boxes of donuts or sacks of bagels or trays of cookies or pizza lunches are skipped over by me, but they see the results. My wife has joked that overnight I went from eating garbage to eating healthier than she does.

In my family, I had my mom and an uncle both taking diabetes medication and statins. After seeing my improvements, they both tried it and have since been able to stop statins and diabetes meds, as well as lose weight. I've been blessed with support.

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Seems to me you need to start eating more huge ass steaks around these people. Or, since you're Mexican, break out that menudo! That stuff puts hair on your chest. ;)

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If anybody is gonna eat pig parts, traditional Mexican cooking (minus the tortillas) is the way to go. Tripa and chicharrón and chorizo and morcilla and cabeza and buche and lengua ... – cerement Jan 29 2012 at 20:26
Hmmmmmmm menudo...they see the steak, they just choose to ignore it. – ROB Jan 30 2012 at 2:32
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I actually haven't experience this. Most people just admit that they don't have the willpower to do what my wife and I do, and that makes us feel good for making the decisions we do. Most people seem more curious about what has led me to be leaner and healthier. I live near some military bases here in Germany and have quite a few friends who work on them. I even help run a ski club that is based on a post, so know quite of few of the military guys. The Machismo runs high in this group, but I haven't taken any flack for my diet. It might be because I'm VERY forward and speak my mind quite easily. It's easy to espouse the benefits of the diet when you look and feel good and it's all because of how you eat and live. Just ignore the naysayers and keep on keepin' on!

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